Saturday, August 10, 2013
This film coupled with Borderline may have caused the emotional outbreak I had when…
…I damaged the property in Becker’s apartment. I am becoming aware this is someone who has experienced this before me and may have done the same thing only that person I am connected to either saw it or visualized it.
Someone in San Francisco is hypnotized…
I found an apartment last night that had a block out shade in the window. Today I was trying to hang something in the window and suddenly felt overcome with the need to sleep. I slept for two hours. Suddenly my eyes popped open, just like Watson in The Woman in Green. Nearly instantly I was wide awake and went back to doing what I was doing before I got sleepy. Earlier in the day I was thinking about Nuneviller and this arm of a dead person I found online. I think it is the suggestion in Ordeal on Locust Street causing the problem. The arm triggered the response.
One can disbelieve this to no avail as it is a neurolinguistic suggestion, at least until it is extinguished. One does not extinguish these things by continuing to fire synapses or triggering a response. This is where I discovered I differed with Skinner and his ideas on Behaviorism, then it hit me he may have been hypnotized himself and operating under the suggestions Watson had already discovered in his work. To extinguish does not me to destroy neurons, it means to stop reinforcing their connections which create the same response. To extinguish a response one would have to inhibit neurons from firing, remove the content from the mind and then one can reprogram the brain. I would also suggest these ideas of repeated responses may be due to projections, dissociations and everyday entanglements.
I put my stuff in and took my stuff out of the Greyhound bus terminal lockers several times…updated
…when traveling from Wilmington to Raleigh to Greenville. I’ve never seen this film but I recognize certain parts of it.
Brenner in this film looks like Barbara Payton…
Friday, August 9, 2013
These two are the same person and attended my high school in Hyde County…
…someone’s personality was splitting – she is the one I recognize as Dorothy Perly. She could have been enmeshed in my things when I was losing control of my bladder because of my mother’s epidural when my brother was born. Perly may be connected to Jean Wallace who was from Massachusetts and who I thought was the one who originally had been molested.
I told her I wasn’t interested in the story about Perly.
This story has The Woman in Green all in it…
Wesley Frazier
Lee Harvey Oswald - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
…I think Frazier was the homosexual who confessed to being a pedophile, in Oswald’s estimation of his behavior.
Dream about bike…
…my senior year in high school I did snatch the screen door of our house open pulling the latch off. I slept in my car that night, a green volkswagon. I think someone was watching a movie about biking and which got enmeshed with my thinking…I did buy a bike about 6 months later, but it was blue, it was a 10-18 speed road bike.
Gray gate……I think this is where the Bicycle dream I had originated…
Thursday, August 8, 2013
He might be the one with the German Measles…
c. 1850 – John Noble Goodwin House - 297 Main Street
……there was a Jewett working at the prison while I was there.
I think this was also one of the hospital problems…
It was formally recognised as an individual entity in 1881, at the International Congress of Medicine in London.[34] In 1914, Alfred Fabian Hess theorised that rubella was caused by a virus, based on work with monkeys.[35] In 1938, Hiro and Tosaka confirmed this by passing the disease to children using filtered nasal washings from acute cases.[32]
I purchased a copy of F. Scott Fitzgerald’s short stories…
At this time she also scored her most successful song, "J'ai deux amours" (1931), and became a muse for contemporary authors, painters, designers and sculptors, including Langston Hughes, Ernest Hemingway, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Pablo Picasso, and Christian Dior. Under the management of Giuseppe Pepito Abatino — a Sicilian former stonemason who passed himself off as a count — Baker's stage and public persona, as well as her singing voice, were transformed.
It was this offenbach I went to…
In 1934 she took the lead in a revival of Jacques Offenbach's opera La Créole,
Kay was dragged from her cell into the examination room and held down by 5 correctional officers…updated
convicts and forcibly expatriated to New France.
During the September massacres of 1792, the Salpêtrière was stormed on the night of 3/4 September by a mob from the impoverished working-class district of the Faubourg Saint-Marcel, with the avowed intention of releasing the detained street-girls; 134 of the prostitutes were released; twenty-five madwomen were less fortunate and were dragged, some still in their chains, into the streets and murdered.[2] Madame Roland, a Girondin supporter of the Revolution in its first liberalising stages, recorded in her Memoirs that the Revolution "has been stained by villains and become hideous".[3]
Pitié-Salpêtrière Hospital - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
At Butner Kay was asked if she wanted to wear pajamas or a gown. She chose the pajamas because the gown made her feel more vulnerable to being assaulted. The nurse then said, you put on the gown. Kay refused and was sent to seclusion where she was strapped down. The orderly crawled all over her strapping her down rather than having another nurse assist.
I was also strapped down at NCCIW Prison but they did not crawl all over me to do it.
Pitié-Salpêtrière Hospital - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
History[edit source | edit]
The Salpêtrière was originally a gunpowder factory ("salpêtre" being a constituent of gunpowder), but was converted to a dumping ground for the poor of Paris. It served as a prison for prostitutes, and a holding place for the mentally disabled, criminally insane, epileptics, and the poor; it was also notable for its population of rats.
In 1656, Louis XIV charged the architect Libéral Bruant to build a hospital on the location of the factory, founding the Hospice de la Salpêtrière. The building was expanded in 1684.
By the eve of the Revolution, it had become the world's largest hospital, with a capacity of 10,000 patients plus 300 prisoners, largely prostitutes swept from the streets of Paris. From La Salpêtrière they were paired with convicts and forcibly expatriated to New France.
During the September massacres of 1792, the Salpêtrière was stormed on the night of 3/4 September by a mob from the impoverished working-class district of the Faubourg Saint-Marcel, with the avowed intention of releasing the detained street-girls; 134 of the prostitutes were released; twenty-five madwomen were less fortunate and were dragged, some still in their chains, into the streets and murdered.[2] Madame Roland, a Girondin supporter of the Revolution in its first liberalising stages, recorded in her Memoirs that the Revolution "has been stained by villains and become hideous".[3]
Pitié-Salpêtrière Hospital - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I have been washing my nasal passages out with vitamin C for 5 years or longer…could be Klenner - updated
It was formally recognised as an individual entity in 1881, at the International Congress of Medicine in London.[34] In 1914, Alfred Fabian Hess theorised that rubella was caused by a virus, based on work with monkeys.[35] In 1938, Hiro and Tosaka confirmed this by passing the disease to children using filtered nasal washings from acute cases.[32]
Kay’s psychiatric hospitalizations…
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
Kay’s Personal History…
…mostly related to New York and Massachusetts Psychiatric hospitals and asylums, due mostly to films, televisions and novels.
1977 Ayden Town Jail, for refusing to get into the Deputy Sheriff’s car
1990 Pitt County Jail, 15 days December 26, 1990 transferred to NCCIW, pre-sentence evaluation Trespassing/Damage to property
1991 NCCIW 3 months returned to Pitt County Jail pending sentencing
1991 Pitt County Jail, awaiting sentencing, appealed sentence to Superior Court, placed under a $10,000 bond I could not post. Pending the appeal, I was under so much duress from the deliberate over crowding of the jail and the inmates that I remanded my appeal.
1991 May 12, violated probation, returned to Prison for 5 months
1994 Wake County jail 55 days
1995 Wake County jail, forgot court date, 4 months
1996 NCCIW (mental health unit) safe-keeper
1998 FCCW 4 months psychiatric care (figure that one out) traffic violations
Psychiatric Treatment History
1972 Tideland Mental Health – acting out in class which consisted of
Me defending another student, by voluntarily leaving the class
After it was clear she was being made a scapegoat for the rest of the students who were engaging in conversation…there was no violent act or violent confrontation, I simply left the classroom after the instructor threw the other student out for something half the classroom was guilty of at that time. I told him, “he should expel me and half the class from the room”. But I have since realized this was not the sole reason for the school psychologist suggesting that I be seen by someone at the Mental Health clinic. I had written a paper which my US History instructor claimed was an abomination, referring to statements I made about the non-existence of God. I further stated that “one could do anything one wanted to”, but I failed to carry the thought to its logical conclusion, in that I should have stated that, “if you are willing to accept the consequences”. I was NOT confronted about this, by one single instructor nor the counselor I saw at mental health.
1973 Tideland Mental Health
1974 Campus psychiatrist after drug overdose
1980 Wake County Alcohol Treatment Facility outpatient 8 months voluntary
1983 Wake County Alcohol Treatment facility inpatient 3 days voluntary
1984 Wake County Alcohol Treatment Facility in and outpatient 7 days, voluntary
1985 Continued outpatient treatment for 1 year, sexual abuse issues Had to discontinue therapy after Blue Cross and Blue Shield claimed I was being treated for a pre-existing condition. As a result I regressed and went back to previous behaviors.
1987 Tideland Mental Health - Therapy /Alcohol Treatment, Voluntary
1988 Tideland Mental Health - Therapy
1989 Pitt Memorial Hospital suicidal , voluntary
1990 Cross Roads Psychiatric Facility, voluntary ECU Outpatient
Psychiatric 2 months, voluntary
Cherry Hospital - drug overdose 3 days, involuntary
1991 North Carolina Correctional Institute for Women Mental Health,involuntary
1991 Cherry Hospital 6 days, involuntary
1992 Nash General hearing voices admitted to Cross Creek
Psychiatric facility, three days – prozac, voluntary
1993 John Umstead 4 days, voluntary
1994 VA Medical Center Salisbury – suicidal , involuntary VA medical Durham, voluntary
1995 VA Medical Center Durham- multiple personalities, involuntary
John Umstead, voluntary
1996 John Umstead 7 days, voluntary
1997 John Umstead, voluntary
1998 Cherry Hospital 2 weeks transferred to VA Medical Center, voluntary
1999 Orange Person Chatham Mental Health
Drug History
Paregoric - infancy to about 8 years of age
Caffeine - started as early as 5 years of age to present
Ether - for tonsillectomy, 1961
Theophylline - childhood to present, heaviest use 1969 to 1973
Nicotine - 1970, 1972 to1990
Alcohol - 1972 to 2000
Phenobarbital - prescription 1972
Donnatal - prescription 1972
Librax - prescription 1972
Marijuana -1973 to 79
Morphine - 1974, Beaufort Co, Emergency following auto accident
Ether - 1974 surgery
Speed (black beauties) - 1974
LSD -1974 ½ hit of Blue Micro dot. Was so fearful of the experience that I did not want to do it again.
Tuinol - 1974 once
Seconal - 1974 once
PCP - 1974 once
Acid - 1974 again at ECU campus party, was intoxicated did not experience hallucinations.
Dexedrine - 1975 to lose weight after getting out of the Army
Hard Liquor - 1975
MDA - 1975 once
Plastidyl - 1976 once
Valium - 1976 once
Poppers (amyl nitrate) - 1978 five times
Flexiril - 1981 one or two
No drugs or alcohol from 1979 to 1983. One mixed drink in 1983.
4 beers in 1984 no more alcohol or drugs from 1984 - November 1986.
Alcohol - November 1986 to May 1987
L-Tyrosine - 1986 over the counter for depression roughly 3 years
L-Tryptophan - 1987 for sleep stopped alcohol use
Choline Bitartrate - 1987 roughly 2 years
Tranxene - 1987 two tablets for anxiety
Ether - 1988 surgery
Phenergan - 1988 nausea following surgery
Alcohol - 1989 half bottle of wine
Restoril - 1989 Pitt Psyche unit
L-Tryptophan - 1989 Pitt Psyche unit
Atarax - 1989 Pitt Psyche unit outbreak of hives (psychogenic, Emotional upset)
Demerol and Valium - 1989 Pitt Psyche Unit for Endoscopy
Ativan - 1990 person
Ativan - prescription. 1990
Theophylline - sinus tabs 10, 1990
Buspar - Prescription 30, 1990
Doxepin - prescription, 1990
Glutamic Acid - unintentional overdose 1990
Xanax - 1990, overdose following overdose of glutamic acid
Doxepin - 1991 prescription, forced meds
Mellaril - 1991 prescription forced meds
Buspar - prescription 1991
Klonopin - 1992 one
Alcohol - 1992 one glass of wine
Alcohol - 1993 two mixed drinks following sexual assault
Ether or ? - Surgery 1993
Effexor - 1993
Glutamic Acid -1993
Alcohol - alcohol 6 pack
Lithium carbonate - 50mcgs over the counter, 50 tabs
Elavil - 1994 two pills
L-Taurine - 1994, 1000mgs per day, 30 days
L-Tyrosine - 1994, 1000mgs per day, 30 days
GABA - 1994, 500mgs per day 30 days
Histidine - 1994, 500 mgs per day
L-Cysteine - 1994, 500 mgs. Per day
L-Methione - 1994, 500mgs 30 day supply
L-Arginine Pyroglutamate - 1994, 500mgs 30 tabs
Trazadone - 1994, during psychiatric hospitalization for sleep
Prozac - 1995 prescription
Xanax - 1995, in combination with prozac, this is a deadly combination
Ativan - prescription, overdosed, 1995
Choline chloride - 1995, took too much became ill administered
Compazine - 1995, for nausea
Alcohol - 1996, wine and beer
Klonopin - 1996 prescription for complex partial seizure
DHEA - 1997 100mgs for four days
Dilantin - 1997
Amytriptylline - 1997 for sleep
Ambien - 1997 for sleep
Alcohol - 1997 4 beers
Ambien - Prescription 1997
Valproic Acid - 1997 prescription
Lithium and Valium - 1997 prescription
Dilantin - 1997 prescription
L-Threonine - 1998 combined with the following three amino acids
L-Lysine - 1998
L-Taurine - 1998
GABA - 1998
MSM - 1998
Depakote - 1998 prescription
Mellaril - 1998 prescription
Thorazine - 1998 from individual
Zyprexa - 1998 sample
Seroquel - 1998 sample
Ativan - 1998 person
Prozac - 1999 prescription
L-Taurine - 1999 over the counter
Depakote - prescription 2000
Risperdal - 2001
It did not become obvious to me until I read Eric Berne’s book, Transactional Analysis and Claude Steiner’s book, Life Scripts, that I realized I had repeatedly been acting out the experience in my childhood when my mother gave me paregoric for various problems, mainly diarrhea. It is also apparent now that I had a complete psychotic break as the result of being given that drug. What does this all mean? Somewhere along the line I was forced into my child state which I acted out repeatedly. I was being abused and I did not realize this because I was and am developmentally retarded because I was not breast fed. I had little knowledge of what was being extracted from my parent and adult states until I began to recognize pieces of my life in books and movies.
Prescription drugs can and do lead to addiction.
I had an IQ of 112 when I was in the 4th grade. My IQ dropped to 103 in 1968.
Medical History of Kay Frances Gibbs
This is a list of medical conditions since childhood.
1961 - Tonsillitis – high fever w/hallucinations
1963 - head injury one stitch hit in head with swing on school grounds
1964 - Migraine headaches – aura w/nausea and vomiting
1968 - migraine headaches
1969 - head injury 10 stitches Dr. James T. Wright
1970 - heart murmur restricted physical activity
1972 - spastic stomach hospitalization/medication
1974 - neck/back injury auto accident Morphine Beaufort Co. Hosp
1975 - shin splint US Army
1981 - Chronic bronchitis Levin no meds recommended smoking cessation
1982 - pitariosis rosea medication
1983 - alcoholism Wake Alcohol treatment facility
1984 - alcoholism Panic attacks acute agoraphobia elevated cholesterol 309
1987 - gallbladder attack Beaufort Co Hospital emergency rm. medication
1988 - alcoholism tideland mental health 10 wk outpatient program - therapy
1988 - lumpectomy benign fibranoma Beaufort Co. Hosp.
1989 - abrasion in lining of stomach psychiatric unit 3 months
1990 - polyp in gallbladder - Medical pavilion Greenville, NC
1991 - chest pain/heart Wake Heart Center - left arm injury Wake Med while incarcerated
1992 - discovered right brain is larger than left brain MRI - EEG Raleigh Community
1994 - head injury Wake Med after physical assault while incarcerated
1996 - complex partial seizure VA Medical Center Klonopin
1998 - migraine headache VA med Center Imitrex
1998 - severe pain in left hip mild degeneration of lower discs naproxin
1999 - TMJ - severe pain in left jaw unable to open mouth to eat UNC Dental School
There was a Fisher who ran the post office in my hometown…
Sara Fisher, a junior studying psychology at Marymount, said.
…she is the one who was working the post office when I mailed my collection of book materials to the copyright office.
While in Pitt Memorial as a patient…
"Much of the staff was drafted during World War II and replaced with nonqualified workers," Sara Fisher, a junior studying psychology at Marymount, said. "Beds were placed in day rooms; infections spread, and there was just one psychologist to care for each 300 patients."
Rockland State Hospital - Asylum Projects
…I resorted to sleeping in the dayroom on the sofa because another patient had smeared her feces all over the wall in her room. I had been moved to that room but the odor was so bad I couldn’t sleep in there and I just didn’t feel comfortable in that room. It seemed eerie to me and too vulnerable to intrusions.
Kay's History Personality: Search results for asylum
Monday, February 4, 2013
I used to love tunnels, now I am thinking the person I’m possessed of may have been in some tunnel under a hospital…updated
…there was some odor down there that I must have been addicted – Ether maybe…I purchased a tank of oxygen back in 1992-1993, must have been the ether…probably laughing gas too
http://www.zimbio.com/Tourism/articles/RK-DLcWD_6L/REMEMBERING+LONDON+CANE+HILL+ASYLUM
http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/abandoned%20mental%20asylum?language=ja_JP
Posted by Kay F Gibbs at 4:22 PM No comments:
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Hudson River Asylum…my first PC came from South Dakota…updated
…this may be the place and someone ended up in Lincoln…image is linked to site with photos…
Posted by Kay F Gibbs at 3:34 PM No comments:
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Saturday, January 26, 2013
I certainly identify with this Plath quote…
I saw the days of the year stretching ahead like a series of bright, white boxes, and separating one box from another was sleep, like a black shade. Only for me, the long perspective of shades that set off one box from the next had suddenly snapped up, and I could see day after day after day glaring ahead of me like a white, broad, infinitely desolate avenue.
I think this is from the prison – Dartmoor or Holloway or even the London Asylum…I think maybe certain species go for periods without sleep and then rest for long periods like bears.
Posted by Kay F Gibbs at 3:30 PM No comments:
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Thursday, January 10, 2013
I just remembered where I recognized this, Richmond, VA, I passed through Richmond on my way to Maryland…
Posted by Kay F Gibbs at 10:32 PM No comments:
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Similar, not exact…
High Royd…
Failed mortgages…
…and they thought they would prostitute me out for novels after they had me crap myself up while under a hypnotic suggestion they programmed into millions of minds so they could get out of debt.
NOT HAPPENING HERE.
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
I found a window like this one in San Francisco but didn’t save it…
…I was on San Bruno, 20th street and 24th street…
I think the arch is an old radio stashed somewhere or a clock on a mantle…
…the Staples who lived next door to us had a clock shaped like that on their mantle in Portsmouth, VA.
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
This is what I was seeing in my sketch I thought was Durer or something to do with the Great Fire of London…
…Loveland Ohio…
My tendency is to act out, which isn’t dormant once it is acknowledged and dealt with…
Kay's History Personality: More issues…
…some of you people act like there is no way to cure or resolve these problems, what the point if their isn’t, why seek treatment. Once it is acted out, IT IS OVER, except for those novelists wishing to profit. I despise your misuse of my deficiencies.
The plaintiff did seduce me, got me intoxicated on Everclear grain alcohol, then got me into AA…
The statement I made, "I could kill you for that", was not unlike similar statements I had made in previous situations with others and even with my sister which I never took seriously.
10 years later I learned alcohol damages brain cells and I grew angry at what was done to me.
Oedipus Complex, denial…updated
It is clear blaming someone else for what one has done diverts the aggression from the self onto another who then becomes the target for aggression from the victim and others.
Reading it is re-creating it in the mind, little more than that can be stated…
Kay's History Personality: More issues…
…I do know I was entangled with the Psyche Department at ECU and UNC via Dr, Calvin Hall and maybe Dr. Susan Hall. I also know my father was entangled with Dr. Hall during his experiments.
Posted October 21, 2004…
…this was before I found and purchased the book, Sense of the Sixties…
more on crime...
Like I posted above, the heart of changing any system, I think, begins with educating the masses, not just a select group of people like the establishment who can exploit those who do not have the same knowledge they do.
In 1994, I was arrested for making a benign statement in a phone conversation, communicating a threat. The plaintiff embellished her story to the magistrate, to include false imprisonment by use of a handgun that I did not own and do not possess, after I had asked her if she would drop me off at the International House of Pancakes, as I had not eaten much for several days and I was hungry, I was walking and it ws hot. She had agreed to do that. On the way I asked her if she had time to stop and let me show her some sketches I had done which I had pawned at a pawn shop. She claimed she was in a hurry but did drop me off at the IHOP. She tried to detain me in her truck in order to continue the conversation we were having. I told her I was hungry and invited her in to eat with me. She refused, we said goodbye and I got out of the truck. After I had dinner, I took the bus from the IHOP to my hotel room and 4 hours later the police were knocking on the door. The plaintiff's obvious guilt and paranoia regarding our history and the things she had done of which I had intimate knowledge, caused her to exaggerate her story in order that I be incarcerated, at which time I did spend 6 months in a jail. Having had a previous record, and without counsel, I was convicted of both charges, after I had been deliberately detained for the length of the sentence, 6 months, before even being tried.
My point is this, not having ever been involved with the legal system in my past in this way, aside from a conviction 4 years earlier, I had no conscious knowledge that communicating a threat was a crime, punishable by law. Had I known that and had I known her state of mind, I certainly would not have verbalized it to her. The statement I made, "I could kill you for that", was not unlike similar statements I had made in previous situations with others and even with my sister which I never took seriously. I was not enraged or even mildly angry, although the plaintiff attempted to make it seem as though I was. I had spent the week prior to our encounter, sleeping on the grounds of the Our Lady of Lourdes Catholic Church, and various other places. I was too exhausted from lack of sleep to even think about killing anyone and I was not contemplating killing even myself under those dire circumstances, yet the plaintiff was smoking profusely, a habit she had when I first met her in 1979 and a habit I had relinquished 4 years earlier. The plaintiff and I had attended AA meetings together, but obviously she had not practiced many of the steps nor sought to resolve her own spiritual disease.
This is what I mean David when I say we need to educate. Anyone can fabricate a story and have someone incarcerated, just to get back at them. I have to wonder how many of the 2 million people in prison and jail in this country are there as the result of similar reasons?
And you know, the system really puts you in a double bind, damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. A therapist wants you to express your feelings, catharsis I believe they call it, and the plaintiff must have known about this as her father was a minister and counseled many people, but I guess if you say it to the wrong person, you get persecuted and prosecuted.
Kay F Gibbs
- posted by Kay @ 2:25 PM 0 comments
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