1218 4th street…we lived on 4th street until 1963…
Saturday, August 25, 2012
“Love cannot be divorced from responsibility”
Man for Himself: An Inquiry Into the Psychology of Ethics - Erich Fromm - Google Books
…this of course has been disproven since the age of the “Me generation” and considering I think Unamuno’s spirit is incarnated in Fromm, the cause for this book is clear.
Faure’ – In Paridisium…
I blogged once I had an evil feeling wash over me when I heard this piece of music, there was something evil associated with it. I also mentioned I had been consumed by some very dark emotions. I felt like I was crawling up the side of a wall on a drain pipe or something. It looked like Davis Library to me. It was at night, it was from the outer realm. I can still see it but the feelings seem to have been somewhat abated. I found this music long after having had this vision.
This title seems to fit…
The Lottery and Other Stories by Shirley Jackson - Reviews, Discussion, Bookclubs, Lists
…not sure about it haven’t read it or perused it.
Friday, August 24, 2012
Thursday, August 23, 2012
I have two minds – I am Hermaphroditic…
…actually I have many minds at the present time.
I am going into a trance state in just a minute. My states are about 30 minutes.
This is what I describe as being in the outer realm…updated
A handful of datura leaves, a trip to the market and some surfing on the internet, revealed to me the hidden cause of numerous episodes of suicidal ideations I have experienced since I was a freshman in college.
I think this has been coming together, I went to Harris Teeter last week and ordered a ham sandwich with mayo, I hadn’t eaten may[sic] mayo in a while on a sandwich. I then a few days later went to Whole Foods and noticed the wind chimes, there wasn’t any wind but I could hear them in my mind. I also looked at the moon rising around the 1st of August, it looked like a Harvest Moon but wasn’t full. I recalled Harvest Moon the song I purchased a year ago. Then of course I discovered the connexxions [sic] and it all has just been culminating and I just kept searching until it came up…
Phoebe Snow’s Poetry Man, Asa on some soap opera, Margaret Atwood (came across her name many times), I ate “mayonnaise” (Officer and Gentleman) on lots of foods mainly tomato sandwiches and had stopped for heart reasons, only recently buying a sub with mayo. I viewed Andy Taylor on Mayberry RFD and Matlock numerous times as did other family members. In 2006 I purchased a copy of A Day on Cape Cod, a relaxation audio CD which included lots of birds chirping and the ocean in the background.
If I had been better informed or educated on Jung’s ideas I may have discovered this book sooner. I wholly believe it is possible by means other than writing to access the unconscious mind without causing harm to one’s self. First and foremost, programming the brain to stay alive (Staying Alive, I listened to frequently) is the key. Making the brain aware of the existence of the unconscious is the next step to surviving its content.
I had the Poetry Man CD by Phoebe Snow but I kept playing it over and over and so I had to get rid of it. Some of the songs are a bit on the depressive side and one songs reads, “Charley Parker died”.
I was out there, on the ground like an animal, darting back and forth…
When I finally got to lay down at around 4:30 AM and drifted off to sleep, I tossed and turned and suddenly found myself in the grassy area beside the dumpster. It was a freaky few hours as I seemed to make my way back and forth through the grass from one side of the dumpster to the other, then going all the way over to the pond and back. I couldn’t tell if a snake was in the process of devouring one of the bunnies or not, it seemed that way. I have encountered their little body parts strewn around the path where I once walked. I no longer walk that way. Suddenly two owls struck up their duet, bellowing like they were going to crash into my window. That kept me awake a few hours. I had forgotten I passed three little bunnies frolicking in the grass about a week before this while on my way to the laundry room.
After sometime I found myself in several of the apartments in the F building, then I flopped over to the E building where I recalled an acquaintance Harold, who was an elderly ex Navy veteran who had become alcoholic. From there I found my way to building C upstairs where Moore lived and then drifted off to sleep. This must be why I thought I was a bat or someone thought they were a bat, they were mixed up with them somewhere.
A few days later I was on my way to the laundry again and encountered four bats flitting around the street lamp and trees on the property. They kept swooping down at me. I made my way to the laundry room and loaded my clothes for washing. I grabbed a stick on my way back and swung it round my head like a lasso, trying to keep them from getting into my hair. I had always heard bats would get tangled in the hair which scared me so I have always been frightened of them. One night one grazed my arm ever so slightly on my way back from the laundry room. It felt eerie but I noticed their bodies seemed soft. I worried more after that because of the possibility of some infection.
B.T. Moore looks like my neighbor upstairs in the C-building a bit, they are from Front Royal, VA. Dr. John Hall administered arsenic to Shakespeare and his family during the plague. Was it murder? My mother’s husband’s first wife poisoned her husband then later died of cancer. He survived. Likely Shakespeare’s wife administered it to him as well as the Doctor. It was said we (Gibbses) lived near Shakespeare but I think it was the Halls and that some of his plays were a reflection of some of their history. Hand washing would be indicative of a doctor preparing for some surgery.
This image is from a film on Hulu, Strangler in the Swamp I think…I had seen this sometime in 2011.
My bird sketch…
The bird represents attachment (also translated as desire or clinging).
Bhavacakra - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I’ve recently started calling it…
I never got a chance to see Being There, I was out on a limb.
…the outer realm.
This can easily be a block to consciousness…
Last night I stepped out for a meal at the K&W. Before returning home I decided to stop into the mall to make a purchase for a tub mat. Upon leaving the store I encountered two young men who clearly intended giving me a lift. I continued on and stopped as I intended going back to the store to get some mints and gum, then I encountered them again, lifting me at which time I became completely dissociated from my intentions and set on a course to leave the mall. I passed four other young men who were clearly students on my way out of the mall who also lifted me. I stopped along the way looking into the glass at the various shops to get my connection back together. It took me about an hour after arriving home to reconnect with my desire for the mints and gum. I then recalled I had been lifted by four young people on my way to the mall who had stopped into the Red Bowl where they play music and I found myself still there after being at home for two hours. I could easily see the inside of the restaurant. I also saw the exit sign located next to the K&W many times before finally calming down.
I was interested in purchasing this book to discover its contents…
A Course in Miracles - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
…but I refrained for reasons which have been revealed to me since that time. I had forgotten an acquaintance with whom I was entangled had purchased the book. Later, what lies beyond forgiveness was revealed to me while I was writing, some of which was from a spirit I was unable to identify but who had attained a level of consciousness through experience far beyond my own.
I think he had an illegitimate heir…
William III of England - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
…likely re-enacted by Princess Diana.
I finished viewing Out on a Limb last night…updated
What's In Kay's Mind 2: After reading some in Psychology of the Transference…
…I had not been able to view the rest of the film in 1986-87 when I think I did attempt seeing it. My job hours were such that I had to work at night. Talk about being interrupted. So now I have taken the opportunity to view this film in its entirety again, still being interrupted from learning its content from beginning to end. This is a clue to some larger picture.
I specifically wanted to mention here briefly, I noticed transferences or projections numerous times between MacClaine and Jerry, especially when Jerry was giving his goodbye speech to Shirley, then it came back to her when she said goodbye to David. I feel this was an invaluable portrayal of opposites, a woman not crying during a break up and a man being tearful, like a child leaving his mother and a woman leaving her father.
I never got a chance to see Being There, I was out on a limb. I attribute my keen skills of observance to my developmental disability.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
The USS Comfort…updated
What's In Kay's Mind 2: Just viewed this…updated
I wrote I felt like I was on a ship in the Army. I didn’t know about the USS Comfort, I was thinking along the lines of a ship from England when my ancestors came here…but now I see it is possible it was something going on during that time…that maybe I was re-enacting a dead body at the bottom of the ship or in the water…or when I fell out of bed…
There are numerous connections to ships going on…
“…there’s got to be more reason than just to serve and help the injured, something deeper, some reason they want to risk their lives…USS Comfort – redemption…”
“You’re a gorgeous piece of ass”…
I will say this once. I have no interest in pornography and you will stop. Take your pornographer and get out or I will have you removed.
After reading some in Psychology of the Transference…
…it was clear my anorexia and bulimia were in the unconscious. I had to re-evaluate some of the television’s influence on my eating habits.
Page 16 clarified the matter. It speaks of the energy of the unconscious I have encountered many times. There was a propensity to go for periods of time without eating then gorging myself, I am now certain was due in part to content being dissociated from my consciousness by people hi-jacking me on the lower levels. This caused me to be without my appetite and drive, which likely did come from unconscious content and my family’s personal history, especially during college and likely occurring when I passed by the brick wall where lots of students hung out between classes. I passed this wall on my way to my psychology class which now tells me I am likely also connected to some psyche students. This is no way means the origins of the unconscious content happened at ECU, the University I was attending at the time, it means we were all likely part of a group of people who happened to be at the same place at the same time, acting out some event from another time and place. The starving and then eating were likely part of the result of War or imprisonments and hospitalizations. Nurses getting enmeshed with soldiers and forgetting to eat.
This is what Jung calls synchronicity, what MacClaine and others call channeling. Jane Roberts wrote volumes on her experience channeling the entity Seth. My inclinations have been toward Jung’s books.
I am also aware of the energies of those with whom I have some enmeshment and have experienced the adolescent surges of male testosterone many times. Over weight individuals also pose a serious problem.
Last night I stepped out for a meal at the K&W. Before returning home I decided to stop into the mall to make a purchase for a tub mat. Upon leaving the store I encountered two young men who clearly intended giving me a lift. I continued on and stopped as I intended going back to the store to get some mints and gum, then I encountered them again, lifting me at which time I became completely dissociated from my intentions and set on a course to leave the mall. I passed four other young men who were clearly students on my way out of the mall who also lifted me. I stopped along the way looking into the glass at the various shops to get my connection back together. It took me about an hour after arriving home to reconnect with my desire for the mints and gum. I then recalled I had been lifted by four young people on my way to the mall who had stopped into the Red Bowl where they play music and I found myself still there after being at home for two hours. I could easily see the inside of the restaurant. I also saw the exit sign located next to the K&W many times before finally calming down.
These are just some of the books I have purchased over the past 13 years…
…some are replacements of books I had prior to 1998…
Elmo, one of the muppets, my brother watched it as a small boy…
What's In Kay's Mind 2: Trash cans (projective identification) for processing information…
…I have been making that cute little sound like Fozzie I think…
“However this novel”…
…I don’t know if this is some unconscious compulsion or if you want me to write you a damned novel which I have not intentions doing. Which ever it is, get a grip.
“Face to face with the power of desire”…
File:Painting of David Hume.jpg - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
…There is a man locally here who looks like this man and every time I see him he is telling me he just got an apartment. My mother also looks a bit like this man in an image I have in which she is wearing a leather bombers jacket – St. Francis Exupery?
Earlier this evening my mother wanted me to take something off her…
…speaking in psychic terms here. After doing that I began to play music for about an hour. I have asked that the music be left off. Apparently my mother’s compulsion to play music was getting uncomfortable so she fobbed it off on me at which time I acted out her wishes. I caught on to it after she told me she liked Last Date and wanted me to continue playing it. On the other hand it could also be Helen, or some writer who wishes to crank up synaptic activity which music will do, for the purposes of writing. I lean toward the first assessment initially but then a combination of all of it.
Head’s up…updated
…some unconscious content has arisen from The Portable Jung, The introverted type pages 229-250. I have been creating this in my personal life from this content and it is part of the source of the ongoing argument I have been having. Synchronicity, Hull Translation, page 37. I Ching, Kerson and Huang, pages 112 and 113, biting.
I also read this book in the 80’s.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
All of the clues manifested in my life, I failed to associate them with the true source…
Phoebe Snow’s Poetry Man, Asa on some soap opera, Margaret Atwood (came across her name many times), I ate “mayonnaise” (Officer and Gentleman) on lots of foods mainly tomato sandwiches and had stopped for heart reasons, only recently buying a sub with it. I viewed Andy Taylor on Mayberry RFD and Matlock numerous times as did other family members. In 2006 I purchased a copy of A Day on Cape Cod, a relaxation audio CD which included lots of birds chirping and the ocean in the background.
If I had been better informed or educated on Jung’s ideas I may have discovered this book sooner. I wholly believe it is possible by means other than writing to access the unconscious mind without causing harm to one’s self. First and foremost, programming the brain to stay alive (Staying Alive, I listened to frequently) is the key. Making the brain aware of the existence of the unconscious is the next step to surviving its content.
I had the Poetry Man CD by Phoebe Snow but I kept playing it over and over and so I had to get rid of it. Some of the songs are a bit on the depressive side and one songs reads, “Charley Parker died”.
“This person has breast cancer”, spoken by Alexander…?
I have encountered someone who has had breast cancer in my youth at a PJ party, 1966-67. She had her left breast removed. She made me touch the scar.
Just viewed this…updated
…upon recommendation I look at the film to identify some of its content. I have never seen it before.
I am certain I have acted it out. In 1983 I owned a floral delivery service in which I distributed flowers throughout Wake County. I had a GE radio much like the one in this film for playing personal tapes as we didn’t have a radio in the van.
In 1990, while taking a psychology course, I drew a tree behind a fence I later deduced was a pyroclastic cloud. I had only been exposed to Jung’s work at that time through The Power of The Subconscious Mind by Joseph Murphy. It was the same year of this film the publication, The Essential Jung, by Anthony Storr was published. I grabbed this book from my shelf and my copy of The Archetypes and the Collective Unconscious by Jung and headed into the living room to type this post. I opened The Essential Jung, immediately to page 198, where is written information regarding being “stuck in the unconscious automatisms of the mind”. This of course is exactly what had been happening to me until I discovered The Tinkling Symbol. Jim Jones and Guyana come to mind as possible victims of this novel and Putnam Photographers. Having performed this feat many, many times, it is clear to me someone read or was reading The Essential Jung at the time some cataclysmic episode occurred, such as the 1980 eruption of Mount St. Helen. I wonder now if the floral delivery service person actually resided in California or Washington State. My drawing could be nothing more than someone having viewed a news report about the event.
This film likely portrays the horrific consequences of that eruption while also capturing the consequences of a nuclear attack, “killing two birds with one stone” (I’ve heard amongst the dialogue). What I did notice about the dialogue in the film, is the father set his oldest son up for death, “move your dead ass”, dramatized in the film as a near case of mother, son suicide, the mother quickly giving up on it as a resolution to their situation. The father also directs his son to wake up, “it’s time to wake up”. This I relate to The Woman In Green, Ordeal on Locust Street and Twenty-Two.
I now feel certain this is what I was acting out in 1988 when I contemplated attempting suicide by asphyxiating myself in my car, although the undiscovered novel at that time was most likely the driving force behind my behavior. There were incidents in my personal life in which I spent the night in my car many times since 1988 and once in 1973 after having viewed a play. Was this a manifestation of the unconscious drama?
I also noticed the birds and fish on Alexander’s shirt after viewing the first part a second time. This also seems related to my painting and The Tinkling Symbol. It all came together as I stated here, I concluded originated from Millbank prison detainees. It is now clear that may have nothing to do with the basis of this book.
Update: Page 201 in The Essential Jung also describes the attributes of the unconscious, “immitigable, immovable, and inaccessible (I question this now)”, with unseen powers which can invade our waking lives.
Monday, August 20, 2012
My first impression of Ms. MacClaine’s book…
GOING WITHIN - Shirley Maclaine - Google Books
…It seems she unintentionally contradicts herself and her belief in channeling. Having just cleared those thoughts from my mind, I can see she too may have been clearing away debris in order to gain mental clarity. Some of her book sounds like physics (M-field), some metaphysics and some plain good sense I think she has aplenty. Maybe, at the time of this publication, Ms. MacLaine was of two minds, struggling to resolve within herself her own battle with a higher level of perception and its ramifications. I have come face to face with the power of desire, I find to be behind the motivation for one’s defense mechanisms.
“Disease begins with a blockage of energy in the spirit”. Based on my experience, this is profoundly accurate, but she goes on to then state “physical problems begin in the consciousness”. My recent experience with the unconscious, which led me to discover the book, The Tinkling Bell, was proof enough to me mental illness resides in the unconscious mind while physical illness resides in the body. What we manifest in our daily lives can easily be part of unconscious content in the mind. It is also clear that which is in the unconscious mind can give rise to illnesses in the body. The stress of the unknown and unknown stresses, I think to which MacClaine refers in her book, can wreak havoc on the human body, on human behavior and on the spirit. If the stress is severe enough it can cause one to act out the content of one’s unconscious mind. Unfortunately this does block ones awareness that one’s behavior is the result of the unconscious mind. One would tend to think it was merely part of one’s daily life. I feel certain this is what MacClaine intends to convey in her book, but like many minds in our modern society, they frequently get clogged like the drain in the kitchen sink.
A handful of datura leaves, a trip to the market and some surfing on the internet, revealed to me the hidden cause of numerous episodes of suicidal ideations I have experienced since I was a freshman in college. Here one can see Jung’s experience with the female patient and the scarab beetle defines the essence of the drama in the unconscious mind. Unfortunately for his patient, she transferred her intuitive side, however briefly, to Jung who completed the drama for her by opening the window and grabbing the beetle. It could be stated, the patient may have felt this to be a more masculine task and so passed it off to a man to complete. Just to make a note of it, I have never read anything by Bela Abzug nor any other feminist.
Long before my own experience I uncovered publications by authors quoting Unamuno, a writer himself, regarding consciousness as taboo. The motivation behind this, of course, is obvious. Clearly a cult developed in which obscuring consciousness was the intention and so we can surmise Ms. MacClaine’s book could be basically a manifestation of the intentions of this cult to disrupt certain levels of human awareness. Having no personal knowledge of her, but perceiving her objectively, I do feel obscuring consciousness was far from her intent by also putting her name and photograph on such a publication.
![sands of time2[4]](http://lh5.ggpht.com/-CxvYTmFr0wM/UDMXsA9xo9I/AAAAAAAASKQ/6Timm6IwMrk/s1600-h/sands%252520of%252520time2%25255B4%25255D%25255B8%25255D.jpg "sands of time2[4]")
David’s Library – Adirondack library…I have not seen very much of this film, I read the book…
Central characters include "David" who is, according to MacLaine herself, a composite character, "
Consciousness of a reality…
This started out being comments on the Documentary on Reality and the Extended Mind below, but I think it’s going to be more than that later. Is it me or is it MacClaine?
I tend to think there are no such things as anomalies of consciousness. We are so unaware of ourselves we often refer to what is truly the manifestation of an unconscious event, as some kind of anomaly. It may feel like an anomaly but what one is experiencing is more a projection or some unconscious event.
Some of my experiences have been quite different, similar to possession and then synchronistic events occur as a result. Not being a writer I have not had the experience of this through writing but I suspect writers know a great deal about it. I have been forced to become conscious of it for reasons of survival and am basically driven because I intend staying out of jails and hospitals, places where the problems seem to flow from one person to another. Snake Pit and Caged are a clear example of this, only wish I had seen it before I got into trouble but it is clear now I was the object of the projections of many who may have seen these films. Sometimes these so called anomalies are more like wake up calls for us to pay more attention to our interconnectedness and that we are affected by our connections to others. It is likely the person staring you in the face had been psychically aware of you, maybe even looking for you and influenced your appearing where you were at the time. Maybe he saved your life, maybe he was just testing his skills. Numerous times I have been in life threatening situations knowing someone was intervening somewhere in someway, sometimes I could hear them. Now it is clear these were likely novels people were reading and responding to mentally. On the other hand there have been other experiences in which I wish there were someone intervening. I recall Jung's story about the scarab beetle. I so deeply wanted to have an experience like it I think I actually influenced an event on the nearby campus in which a ladybug lit on my coat and I had, just days before that, written something about a person nicknamed "Lady Bug". I was quite surprised by the incident. I discovered, after reading that story, Jung had actually robbed the woman of her intuitive self. Had he coached her into overcoming her fear of her own psychic awareness, she would have marched over to the window at the time the beetle appeared and opened it, grasping the beetle in her own hand. In my youth I played with beetles all the time, picking them up and even tying a string to one leg and flying them like those small airplane replicas. Children have less fear than adults who have been programmed to be a certain way.
The reason we don’t affect everyone with our thoughts or input is because we likely have no psychic connection to them. Shirley MacClain’s, Out on a Limb was the first book I read on the subject, her work being described as channeling, and with whom I have felt a connection. She is one of the few people I have found to be realistic and honest about this phenomenon, although she has talked about it in a way the general public could more easily accept and given my personal experience on viewing The Exorcist I can see the necessity.. MacClain certainly is “no fatalist”, to quote her in one of her interviews and one has to really grasp her ideas and intent to understand what she is about on this subject. I will reiterate her comments that sometimes one has to hit rock bottom like the alcoholic to be willing and willingness is the key to being teachable. The book had a major impact on my consciousness which would not be revealed to me until years later. I have also read other self help (pop psychology) books that have aided my consciousness. This is the kind of learning, from the personal experiences of others, you will never find in four or five years of academic psychology courses. Mind to Mind is also another example of the documentation of this kind of personal experience. JW Dunne's book, An Experiment with Time, put me onto this phenomena and the idea of aging outside the human body. I only read a portion of the book but I picked up on the implications in the parts I did read. I also read Dream Telepathy and Entangled Minds. I also read Experiments in Mental Suggestion published in the 1920's. The film, What the Bleep Do We Know was also helpful. I suspect Tibetan Monks and other cloistered people are far more aware and adept at this level of awareness than most of us in our noisy busy lives. One must surely appreciate and thank actors and actresses who are adept at this kind of impulse work. I use the term impulse as it is the only way to reveal what actually happens. Clearly it is very dangerous, to which I can attest, having had no consciousness regarding what I was doing at the time. I simply never expected to find myself in the middle of someone else’s history.
I too was strongly influenced by the film Anger Management, when Nicholson's character, Rydell asked Buznik "who are you". At first I didn't get it but then it hit me what he was talking about. I had a clue about it after resolving what I thought was my fear over The Exorcist, but wasn't sure until I started digging further into my own personal experiences. I discovered the design of our apartment in Portsmouth, Virginia was different from what I had seen while growing up. I have always denied experiencing any hallucinations on several visits to Psychiatrists because I didn't know what I had experienced was an hallucination, I thought it actually existed and believed this until recently. I'm sparing you all the details. Suffice it to say I was shocked when I made this discovery.
All we see & seem is but a dream within a dream - YouTube
…The astronaut movie clip in this film likely gave rise to numerous cases of wrist cutting and self harm…
This is the origins of many of the images I have been finding…I recognize the synagogue now…
I think it is the origins of my accident in 1974 with the MGBGT. RE: Carnival of Souls – my first impression was someone left the church or a place near the church or the Serpentine Gallery (since I had a serpentine belt) and headed across Kensington Gardens toward the Palace. They encountered a large group of people on the straight course and had to veer off to the right, being struck in the forehead by an elbow, then headed straight toward the pond. There they made the left turn to go around the pond to the palace. They likely communicated this to someone at the palace and it was passed on to another…In 1964 I was playing on the court yard and was trying to pass a group of school yard guards gathered between two sets of swings. I veered to the right and was struck in the head by a swing in which a girl named rosemary was swinging. I was hit again in 1968. In 1974 I was driving down a stretch of road like the serpentine and tried to make a left turn but was going too fast and hit a car blocking the way. This would be the opposite and accurate for the Serpentine, in which someone tried to make the curves going too fast and nearly hit the water, also re-enacted here in Chapel Hill not too long ago by one I thought to look like Michael Gambon. He almost smashed into the bridge abuttment and creek but was saved by all the brush. This was also depicted in THX 1156. In Carnival of Souls someone was racing in the opposite direction. Of course that could have gone on anywhere at any time at any bridge. It was common during the time period.
I said this about the walking and getting bumped into as I have experienced this many times and it was turned into other sometimes more serious situations.
Sunday, August 19, 2012
Camelot Pond…
The second image is the pond in 2007…Ordeal on Locust Street comes to mind. Below the Round Pond, London, Hyde Park. There may be a burial mound it somewhere.
Trash cans (projective identification) for processing information…
Organophosphate poisoning most commonly results from exposure to insecticides or nerve agents. OPs are one of the most common causes of poisoning worldwide, and are frequently intentionally used in suicides in agrarian areas.[1][2] There are around 1 million OP poisonings per year with several hundred thousand resulting in fatalities annually.
Organophosphate poisoning - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
What's In Kay's Mind 2: The Tinkling Symbol…
…then programmed to dispose on one’s self.
ADHD, organophosphates, alcoholism and magazine and TV advertising…
Now I see why Watson looked at more than 5000 magazines over a period of decades.
The Tinkling Symbol…
Organophosphate poisoning most commonly results from exposure to insecticides or nerve agents. OPs are one of the most common causes of poisoning worldwide, and are frequently intentionally used in suicides in agrarian areas.[1][2] There are around 1 million OP poisonings per year with several hundred thousand resulting in fatalities annually.
Organophosphate poisoning - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Fluoxetine, alprazolam, psychic connections and the unconscious content of the mind…
Serotonin blocks vasopressin-facilitat... [Physiol Behav. 1996 Apr-May] - PubMed - NCBI
The above article states fluoxetine does not promote offensive aggression. My experience with 20 mgs fluoxetine (Prozac) has been quite the opposite. The difference in this experiment and my experience being I am not a hamster or rat, I am a thinking person. However, since that time I have discovered part of the cause was the dialogue in my mind, the origins of which I have been unaware until recently. I had never been psychologically prepared for the voluminous amount of information I had been receiving through media and books, or for what was in my mind at the time of the incident. I had been exposed to higher than average levels of noise from refrigeration equipment which elevated my brainwave activity. This could have caused me to generate unconscious thoughts and awareness about television and books, never made conscious until the evening I took the alprazolam, during which time I was asleep when these realizations occurred, if in fact, they happened in my mind at all. It is my understanding that this information must be put into the brain for consciousness to happen.
In 1995, I took one .25 mg alprazolam (Xanax) tab after taking fluoxetine for several nights as prescribed. The following day I went out and upon returning home, I found myself out of control and ripping up a good number of my mother’s novels. I wasn’t even conscious of what caused my actions. This was an ongoing problem with me, running from these incidents, fearful I was possessed of some innate evil and helpless to do anything about it. Mental Health care had proven to be of no help. Later it was clear to me the alprazolam I took for sleep, was a contributing factor in my behavior, causing frontal lobe inhibition, resulting in my inability to police my actions at the time. I was not suicidal nor had I been for quite awhile, yet I had been behaving in a manner destructive to my spirit. This continued even after disclosing to psychiatric staff at a hospital in 1989, I was more interested in being constructive as opposed to productive, since I am human, not a machine. Some of these ideas could have come from books I read about behavior, as I vaguely recall something regarding constructive behavior being discussed. Prior to this 3 month psychiatric hospitalization, an acquaintance stated I needed to stop reading pop psychology, much to my amazement, since those books helped me the most. It was then I grew decidedly suspicious about some of my acquaintances, later discovering I was being abused in a way I had never contemplated. It was long after this I also learned of the impact a lack of breast feeding had on my personality.
Over the past 10 years evidence has pointed to a psychic connection with another individual who may have been the true source of the rage in 1995. It is possible this person discovered the derivation of some unwanted behavior, she or someone she knows, read in a novel and became enraged, containing her thoughts in her mind, possibly even dissociating them. I likely became the recipient or object of her thoughts (projective identification) during our second encounter in 1989. Then, when I took the fluoxetine and alprazolam, I acted on those thoughts generated by her since these substances promote neuro-inhibitory activity in the brain, while serotonin is also anti-depressive. I have been connected to this person psychically, for at least 10 years and possibly as long as 1970. It is clear the person was also connected to someone else who was monitoring (writing) the entire matter as they created a film about it I found and viewed in 1996, along with several other films unrelated to this event but related to my personal experiences. I physically encountered this person in 1985 in an establishment I assumed she clearly did not frequent as her dress and behavior gave me cause to notice her. I was not conscious of psychic connections at the time, nor at the time I encountered her again in 1989 in the psychiatric hospital and did not remember her from our 1985, non-physical, encounter. This person was also on medication.
Being distressed over my actions, this incident and a more serious incident later, with the same person, prompted me to examine my own behavior and how it has been affected by television I have seen and books I have read and what others have read and seen around me. What I discovered was quite shocking and distressing. Since that time I have taken tryptophan and GABA together, without consequence. I have consumed cheese which contains tryptamine, a precursor to serotonin, with other neuro-inhibitory products, with no similar problems. I have consumed 5HTP derived from Griffonia Simplicifolia, 1 per day with GABA without consequence. It was also during these periods in the last 10 years, while taking tryptophan and GABA, I did experience, on five occasions, episodes of feeling hopeless and suicidal. I read about the unconscious mind in numerous books by Carl Jung, actually unknowingly experiencing the content of the unconscious mind many times and now recognize the 1995 incident as being one such experience. In making these connections, I inadvertently discovered, in all certainty, the origin and location of more psychic connections, in another State, from which the encounter derived. In addition to this, over the past week I discovered a book about suicides, The Tinkling Symbol, through the manifestation of unconscious content, I was able to associate, in a complex way, with Millbank Prison in London, England, no longer in existence. During the time of its closing many inmates were transported to the United States where they may have found their way into North Carolina during the US Civil War, the State where I currently reside.
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